An Open Letter to Anyone

Dear You,

We met in this world, where words are the only tools to express ourselves, and emoticons have become little pictures of ourselves. And no matter how much I tried to warn you, that there is a fine line between this world and reality, you shared your entirety with me.

Let me say that I find you beautiful when you are vulnerable. You made me very intrigued and curious about you. You believe I am a charmer of words, but I am being honest and true to myself. For I believe that women should feel loved every single day with no exception. I believe in spontaneity and in acts of great gestures; for how else can love be expressed? For such a love to be a mix of overflowing emotions there is no other way.

Still, I would give you this fair warning. I am not looking for a relationship. In truth, it would be unfair for me to show you a love that is not full. And even if you offer your love for me, I have to fix myself first alone. Why? You see, I have become a cynic and a sceptic of the love that lasts forever. The love that has once flowed through my veins has been lost in the words of idealism and dreams. And I do not wish for it anymore. This alone has made me the worst person to be with right now. Words come by without any hint of emotions. My smiles hardly come by and all the words of flattery from you are just that—words. I am not moved by anything or anyone. My heart has become stagnant.

So I came here to apologize for how many times I have hurt you and for how many times I made you feel insignificant, unsafe and untrue. It was never my intention, but there are no excuses. I am sad that I have made someone feel that way. I am sad because I cannot offer you what you are offering me, not now and not ever. All I can offer are words and a friendship.

And even if these are just words that seem to be a mere fabrication of life, for what it is worth, I am truly sorry.

Always,
R

:-)

<-----------------thinking

whoever that person is, i think she is willing to wait until you are whole again..:)

laidback2899 wrote:

whoever that person is, i think she is willing to wait until you are whole again..:)

it could be hypothetical though... ;-)

Just read this now. Very wonderfully, honestly written :)

Sunflowers for Sunshine wrote:

Just read this now. Very wonderfully, honestly written :)

Thanks sunshine :)

Dear Twish,

“Fate led you straight to me
You came and suddenly I was weak beyond control
I have given you my soul
My life was no longer mine...”

Every time I hear these lines from one of my favorite songs (which I first heard from you), I feel a stinging pain in my heart and deep within, my soul quietly weeps. As the sadness resonates into my entire being, my mind sails into emptiness. I drown myself with your memories not wanting to let go although it is already hurting me.

We went our separate ways but you never really left because inside my heart you are there and in my mind you float constantly. But then these feelings are not enough to give comfort to my lonely soul.

I never believed in “-could’ve-been”... But every day, when I remember you, I think about what could’ve been if I didn’t walk out the door, if I didn’t take that step away from you, if I stayed. One stupid decision and I ruined my chance to happiness.

For a very long time, I had been on my own. Always on guard with my feelings. I was afraid that I might, again, hurt someone who loves me and who I also love. What happened before cannot happen again. Once is enough.

But you proved me wrong. I knew then that we were so wrong for each other. I did everything to stay away from you, from your love. But it was so strong that it has drawn me to you. The more I ignored the feeling, the stronger it became. The more I ran away from you, the more you pulled me to you. I realized that there was no point running away, I have already fallen in love with you.

I never believed that human beings can love unconditionally, I have always seen it as something divine. But you never gave up until you made me believe that the love you have for me was true, that what we shared was real. You taught me that I cannot open my heart to someone without trusting, that I cannot love without opening my heart. What we had was so wonderful. It was like a beautiful dream, I never wanted to wake up. My life that once was in black and white suddenly became vibrant with colors. I started to live again because of you.

But I will always be me. No matter how much I loved you, I still end up hurting you. My restless nature, my selfish ways.

You were understanding even if I was unreasonably difficult. You always tried to explain things even if you didn't have to. You stayed even if the dream that was once beautiful slowly turned into a nightmare. You held on and believed that things will be better. You loved me at my best, and you even loved me more at my worst.

I saw the pain in your eyes, I knew there were unshed tears. I felt the loneliness slowly consuming you. You've given me your life so I could live, and I selfishly claimed it. It broke my heart to see you crumbled into ruins, all because of me. I made a decision, which I thought was the best and the easiest way out for both of us. I fooled around and cheated on you.

For the nth time, you proved me wrong. You have forgiven me. It melted my heart, weakened my soul. That very moment, not only did I give back your life, I gave mine as well. I loved you more, so I took a step back and headed for the door because I wanted you to live.

All these years, I still think about you.

Wow. Lovely letters. Great job guys. I hope you find your muses soon.

BRILLIANT.

Babe,
 I do not want to destroy this day but, I am saying goodbye now. The last break up really tore me apart even if it’s my fault and the situation we have right now, made me feel miserable every day. You are hurting me deeply inside. I can’t take it anymore. It breaks me into pieces. I can't think straight. I don’t know why I’m taking this seriously kahit na ang dami ko ng kabiguan na napagdaan sa buong buhay ko pero lahat un nagawa kong lagpasan at ngumiti pero ito di ko kaya na di ko din alam kung bakit. I’m a great liar kasi isipin mo I convince myself na kayang kitang mahalin selflessly. Every day, I wake up and pray na kaya ko to dahil mahal ko sya at ung pagmamahal na yun ay dapat kong ibigay.  But, everyday na ginagawa ko yun I'm losing myself in the process. To be honest, last weeks of june, alam ko di ko na kilala  sarili ko at ayoko nun. I need myself back if I want to finish my studies. I am letting you go. I love you. I really do that is why I won’t hold you anymore and give you the chance to meet someone new and much better than me.

I don’t have a new one baka isipin mo kaya ganito. I honestly don’t want to like or love a person since I know I will forever stuck with you. Forever is such a strong word but, if ever I will spent my life with, it must be you or someone like you. She will be nothing compare to you and I will totally be jealous for the next person whomever you will love since I will forever be stuck on the duplicate of yours. I will even curse myself on this one since I will never have you back in my life again after this. But, I am optimistic on this one and believe na kung para talaga tayo sa isa’t isa, tayo pa rin sa end. You’re thinking that I would change my mind but, this time, I firmly stand on this one.  I am sorry if I lost all the chances you gave to me and thank you dahil pinakita mo sa akin kung anu ang kelangan para talaga mahalin mo ng tunay ang isang tao. I honestly say na naging masaya ako this 3 months. I will still keep the watch and remember that someday, you will be back and you will again love me wholly as I will do the same.  

I blame myself for all of this. I will never ever blame you. I am just stating what I felt. We both need these two years for ourselves and our own priorities. I won’t stop talking to you but, if you don’t want to talk to me after this, it’s okay. But, for me, I will still keep talking to you. If you are generous enough, can you please give me your smart # when you  leave? But, if you don’t want to, it’s okay. Our relationship has ended but, our communication didn’t . Right? I will still be waiting for you. I will still love you. I will never forget you. But, for now, it’s time to say goodbye. Goodbye, babe. Goodbye to the only person that loved me for who I am. Goodbye. Take care always. I love you forever and ever, babe. :*

P.S. You are always been part of my prayer. I will always pray for your safety in   Doha until you will come back here safely.

030713